Guilty.

I'm feeling slightly guilty for tonight's "dinner". I ordered pizza... which wouldn't be so bad.

Except.

I went out to brunch, too.

Oops.

House Rulls

This year, I've really been working on our "Family Rules". I grew up in a loving home, and we had set boundaries- and that's something I want for my kids too!

Some (basic) rules we have are:

1. Sit together for dinner as often as possible.
2. Respect each other (no yelling, back talking, don't be demanding)
3. Use a kind loving tone, even when disciplining (I admit, this isn't always easy... but I'm working on it)
4. ABSOLUTELY no hitting. Hands are for hugging!
5. Help clean up our messes.


Well, tonight I learned a tough lesson on follow through. My husband and I have laid out some consequences for breaking the rules.... and tonight Logan hit his sister. The consequence for hitting in our house is: no TV, no treats, go to bed 30 minutes early.

After he hit her, I sat him down, and got eye to eye with him. I lowered my voice and spoke in very clear three to five word sentences (this tecnique is called "low and slow"; it's very useful for children with sensory issues). "Logan, (pause) we don't hit. (pause) Hands are for hugging. (pause) When we hit (pause) then there is a consequence. (pause)" I repeated that phrase about three times. He was very upset and I hugged him and told him that he needed to cool off in his room for 4 minutes.

I SO badly wanted to run in there and tell him "no big deal blah blah blah" and then give him cookies and pretend nothing happened- but that wouldn't be very responsible of me {poo}.

Luckily for me, this incident happened around 6.30pm ANYWAY, so I didn't have too much back lash- I just started my bedtime routine right then! But when I laid him down at 7.30, and he begged me to let him watch TV, and he told me how sorry he was, and how he wanted to talk to sister and tell her he was wrong- I REALLY wanted to give in... but I didn't. I lovingly told him "that phrase" hugged him and told him that I love him very much.


And now??

He's asleep. And it's not even 8 yet... I guess there is something to be said about following through. Who knew?

Five

In honor of our

FIFTH wedding anniversary

(nine years together)

we've decided to go on a kid free weekend getaway to the beach!

I can't wait to get some much needed rest and relaxation with my hubby ;)

Out Grown

We have a beautiful home, on a quiet street, in a gated community... but some days I feel overwhelmed by the clutter, and lack of storage. The truth is, we've out grown this house and are in the market for a new one!

We've lived here for (almost) six years, and honestly it will be hard to move from the home where we brought our children home. Where they BOTH took their first steps. Where we built a life...

BUT

We found a beautiful piece of property about 20 miles south of where we live now. It's about 1/2 an acre on a river (that opens up to the mouth of the Gulf)- and honestly it's a steal! Once we buy the land, we'll have two years to build a home.

I'm REALLY looking forward to designing a home that fits our needs. I'm praying that it all works out and we're able to sell our home and build our DREAM home :)

I'm Back!

I'm sorry I've taken such a long hiatus from this blog- I've just been trying to catch my breath here!

Sometimes I find it hard to find the balance between mom, wife, lover, and friend.

I'll give you the Cliff Notes version of what's been going on:

1. My husband searched for a new job.
2. Walks in the door and says "let's go on a cruise." We book it, and leave a week later (um... seriously people I didn't even have Lily's birth certificate, let alone sun screen!)
3. He quit his job at the bank and moved to a completely different field.
4. Lily's Birthday! She's one- how fast did that go?!?
5. We celebrated Easter (He's Alive!).
6. I take the kids (with my mom) to NYC to visit my sister. Loved the city, but so glad I live in suburbia.
7. Beth Moore Conference.

That's it for now! Off to Bible study. Oh! and check back later- I have pictures to put up :)

Playing Catch

-Up that is!

We've been so busy, I haven't found time to blog at all :(

When Lily's napping I'll write a post on all that's been going on (including our surprise family cruise my hubby gave me).

For now, I want to vent... about myself. A couple months ago I wrote this post about suffering from the "manys". That was a serious five finger point at M-E. And here I am three months later going around that same mountain.

iwillpurgeiwillpurgeiwillpurge

This spring, I'm doing some SERIOUS spring cleaning (and hopefully helping some folks out in the process).

Okay, back to folding about 4 loads of laundry (no joke).

He's not just anyone, he's my son

Yesterday Logan came home with his first report card. I found it at the bottom of his bag, tucked neatly in a white envelope. I opened it- not know what it was.

Once I unfolded it, and figured out what it was my heart sank. I saw several Ns (to be expected) and felt a deep sadness*... but I wasn't surprised.

*It's one thing to know your son has a "delay" or isn't typical, and it's another thing to see it in black and white on a very official looking state approved report card.

The report listed the goals for this year (there were 6) and then gave a grade next to each one. M- mastered, S- satisfactory, and N- needs improvement. He got 2 Ns and 4 Ss.

Annual Goal that received an N:

• Circle time- participate for 15 minutes and answer simple questions.
  
• Demonstrate fine motor skills and coordination needed for writing.

There was also an entire page of accomplishments and tribulations. A couple things that stood out: "Logan is learning to do things more independently like open his own milk carton and food wrappers." and "Logan uses the bathroom independently with no accidents!".

When I read that I thought (insert sarcastic tone here) "great".

As I was driving today I prayed a prayer I've prayed many many many times. It went something like:

"I need to You to heal him. / Please Lord God give me the strength to help him grow into a strong man of God. / Free him of his OCD, Lord. / Help him not to be scared Father. Let him know You're there."

And Mark Schultz's song "He's my Son" came on the radio.

That's it! That's my song!

Now, I know that song is a tragic song about a terminally ill child- but I really felt like it described my prayer. He doesn't have a terminal disease (Thank You Thank You Thank You Jesus for that), yet he's a prisoner in his own mind. He's constantly telling me he has a stomach ache (worry) or he's scared (panic).

We're working on it Logan. I'm doing my best, I hope it's enough.

I'm down on my knees again tonight
I'm hoping this prayer will turn out right
See there is a boy that needs Your help
I've done all that I can do myself
His mother is tired
I'm sure You can understand
Each night as he sleeps
She goes in to hold his hand
And she tries not to cry
As the tears fill her eyes

CHORUS:
Can You hear me?
Am I getting through tonight?
Can You see him?
Can You make him feel all right?
If You can hear me
Let me take his place somehow
See, he's not just anyone
He's my son

Sometimes late at night I watch him sleep
I dream of the boy he'd like to be
I try to be strong and see him through
But God who he needs right now is You
Let him grow old
Live life without this fear
What would I be
Living without him here
He's so tired and he's scared
Let him know that You're there

CHORUS

Can You hear me?
Can You see him?
Please don't leave him
He's my son