Monday, November 16, 2009

Logan's One Month Evaluation

**I couldn't get pictures to upload- check back for photos**

On Friday we had Logan's one month Therapeutic Pre School Evaluation.

Every month the psychiatrist makes a home visit to discuss Logan's progress. This was our first evaluation- and I was eager to hear how he's been doing in school.

She said he's been doing really well riding the bus, following directions, and not being anxious. I was pleasantly surprised! She said he hasn't demonstrated anxiety characteristics in a while- and I was thrilled!!

She also mentioned that she and him have a special bond, and he lights up when he sees her. She said she loved working with him, and looks forward to watching him grow.

She said the areas he needs to work on are:

  • Touching/throwing sand. This is one of his (many) sensory issues. He likes to feel the sand running through his fingers. She said he gets so fixated that they (his teachers) have to make it "off limits" some days.
  • Touching other people. Logan will "pet" other people to feel their clothes, or body. The other kids don't like it- so he needs to work on keeping his hands to himsef.
  • Pooping on the potty.
  • Talking about the phone.
  • Doing "The Claw" (he claws his hand at inappropriate times)
She gave me some more social stories* to read to him every night on:
  • Eating too fast (I know, I was shocked too!)
  • Chewing with your mouth closed
  • Not interrupting
  • Completing a request
  • Getting the attention of others
  • Hearing "No"
  • Making a request
  • Using a napkin (he uses his shirt-hehehehe)
  • Showing affection
  • Shutting the bathroom door
*A social story is a short story that gives children simple explanations to everyday tasks. Example: Little boys go to school./Little boys ride on the bus to school./Little boys stay seated on the bus./Little boys get off the bus./Little boys line up for class./Little boys go to school./Logan's going to school.

I know this seems trivial, but she used the term "next year". I guess he won't be graduating to "regular" preschool next year. Oh well, maybe kindergarten.

Sunday, November 15, 2009

The Giving Tree

**Warning: This post contains raw, real emotions. I'd like to preface this with how much I love being a Mom. How I dreamed of having a child, and how I am thankful to God everyday for blessing me with two beautiful children, perfect in His image. I know many people struggle with infertility, or loss of a child and make no mistake, I pray for those people out there everyday. I know how blessed I am to have my kids on this side of eternity- and I'm thankful.

That said- Let the rant ensue.

There are days where I feel sorry for myself, and today is one of those days.

I try very hard to have a cheery, light hearted, optimistic spirit- most of the time. But today, I just want to complain.

Everyday I give and give and give and give and give, and explain, and give, and explain, and give and give. And then when the house is finally quiet, and the last potty break is over, and the last cup of water has been drank- I give some more.

Don't get me wrong, I love being a Mom, but on days like this I find myself asking: why me?

Why is it I can't walk into a store without talking about a phone. I would love to go to a store and not talk about a freaking phone. On that note, I would love to go ONE DAY without "pretending" to talk on the phone. You know what- I WOULD LOVE TO NOT SEE A PHONE FOR ONE DAY. That, friends, would be a good day.

I would love not to hear an absolutley, horrific, ear piercing screeching whale come out of my son's mouth. I would love to not hear it at bed time.

What did I do to deserve this? Why do I have to constantly explain explain explain why we can or can't do something. I would love to go one day with out having to worry about my son having a panic attack.

I would love to go one day without thinking about, worrying about, or talking about sensory issues. I would love not to worry about the volume of something, or the feeling (the physical feeling) of something. That would be AWESOME.

I would love not to worry about my son's future issues. Wondering what his OCD fixation will be when he's 15. It probubly won't be phones- so what? What will it be?

I would love to not think about poop. I would love for Logan to GO POOP.

I would love if my daughter was no longer teething. I would love for all those little boogers to pop right through, with no pain-therefore no crying.

I never asked for this. As a child, I never sat back and thought "Oh, I can't wait to grow up, get married, and have a baby boy with special needs."

I absolutely, undoubtedly love my son, but sometimes I just wish he was..."typical".

I would love to have a husband that worked normal hours, at a job he loved so I didn't have to put the kids to bed- all-by-my-self 5 nights a week.

I would have loved him to not go to that meeting last night- and I hope he doesn't go tonight.

I would love to shower, shave and go to the bathroom without an interruption.

And finally I would love a vacation- scratch that- I would love a night off.

Rant. Over.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009


Sometimes I believe the Holy Spirit works through you when you least expected it.

Today, while I was visiting a new superstore (which was awesome minus this incident) Logan got confused and began to have one of his "mini meltdowns"- which includes screaming.

~For those of you who know my son, you know his screaming is very loud, very high pitched, and honestly very uncomfortable.

I held his hand and walked down the main grocery isle to grab the last thing I needed for dinner so we could check out and head home. It was as if a spot light was on me. People were coming out of the isles to see what was going on. No exaggeration, there were at least 40 people turned and looked at me and my sweet boy. Now, that being said, it was 30-45 seconds of excruciatingly loud uncomfortable screaming (which I'm used to) so I can understand why people were looking. But what they don't understand was this was not a "typical" child "I want that toy I can't have" tantrum. This was a little boy having an anxiety attack because he didn't understand something. I can't imagine how scary it must feel for him to feel trapped in his own world of fear and worry.

Anyway, while I was quickly grabing the thing I needed an old crotchy lady leaned over a very sternly said "Young man, you need to mind your manners while your...".

Before I could even think of what to say I threw him behind me (as if to physically protect him from the verbal daggers she was throwing at him) and said "Listen, lady, he has special needs."

And she looked at me with a stone cold look as I walked briskly away.

By the time I got back to the produce section, Logan had calmed down, but I was in tears. I thought of all the things I "should have said". I think the Holy Spirit was my filter at that moment.

So, for those of you who were at that superstore on this day and this time, I'm sorry. And for those of you who may encounter a screaming child in a superstore, before giving dirty looks or even saying a nasty comment* please think twice.

*I know most people would never do that, but everyone has weak moments-I'm sure back in my day I would have given "the look". There were some (few, but some) friendly faces that looked at me with sadness-as if they were saying "I've been there".

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

The Rumors are True

Every year, on August 9 (the day after my birthday) I put out all my fall decorations. I absolutely, with out a doubt LOVE the Holidays and it kicks off with my birthday!

I put out pumpkins, scarecrows and anything "harvesty"-usually.

This year was different, though. I was tired. I have two young kids, one with special needs and one breastfeeding and I thought napping was more important then decorating...

So, because I usually get three whole months of fall, and Christmas gets a measly 35(ish) days (if you decorate the day after Thanksgiving) that I would decorate for Christmas early-a whole month early!!

On November 5, we decorated the entire inside of our house! Logan and Lily love the lights on the tree and all the animated Christmas stuffed animals. And Logan had a blast hanging the ornaments on the tree this year. I just love being able to enjoy all the beautiful decorations I've collected over the years.

This weekend we'll be working outside decor! Can't wait to give hubby the good news :)